I think I finally found the devine antidote to life.
this is probably the closest ive came to a sustained happiness with also having to let go of certain posessions whether it may be a human or something of the material sort.
tangible.
“I should warn you I go to sleep, I know you don't know what I mean yet, I get upset or happy, I go to sleep nothing hurts when I go to sleep but I'm not tired I'm not tired...”
-ben folds five
that used to be me every single day
when morning did its job the first thing that would run through my mind was when the hell was i going to be able to sleep again.

Has anyone seen my will to live, because I seem to have lost it.

fighting concordance;

So many times I've ranted about the insufficient pseudo progress we claim to embrace as purpose.
How those who oppose majority standards are portrayed as "scum" simply because majority was raised to deliver obedience to society,which already suffers from eroding foundations.
Laced with nothing but pre-processed ignorance.
Those sentimentalities that land you closest to reality can't be accounted for through the material field.
THERE ARE MANY CRACKS IN THIS FACADE.